November 14, 2009

Murphy’s Law #5

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The Smoke Detector

 

Murphy’s law is an adage that broadly states: “Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.”

 

This time it’s not so much that it’s broken, but the timing of the need for a new battery.

 

This week has been tough. There has been a lot of puke and diarrhea.  There have been too many hours of crying and fussing and not enough hours of peaceful sleep.

 

So after getting everyone medicated and down for the night, I was optimistic that I, too, would get some well-needed sleep.

 

I headed up to bed and read for a while, then drifted off into sleepy bliss.  I will admit that I did get a very good chunk of sleep.  I slept for close to six hours, which is practically unheard of for me.

 

Something woke me up.  I heard a *chirp*.  In my brain I tried to rationalize that I was imagining it.  Or that it was the yippy dog that lives behind us.  *chirp*  There it was again.  Still in a sleepy fog, I thought maybe it’s a cricket.  *chirp* I can sleep through a cricket.  Nobody is awake.  Nobody is crying.  The dog is blockaded in my bathroom where there is only tile.  I am not getting up to chase a cricket away . *chirp*.   So I counted to see how often it was making noise.  *chirp*  Twenty seconds.  There is no way I can fall back asleep in 20 seconds.  By now I am awake and keenly aware that it is cold outside of my flannel sheets and blankets.   *chirp*  I am now fairly certain it’s not a cricket, rather it’s the smoke detector.  *chirp* CRAP!  I have to go change the battery.

 

So I roll out of bed and stand in the hallway trying to determine which one is chirping.  *chirp*  It’s not the one outside my bedroom.  Please dear God, don’t let it be the one at the end of the hall by the girls’ rooms. *chirp*

 

WHEW! It’s on the one downstairs.  So I head downstairs, get the stepstool.  Climb to the top step and try to figure out how to open the darn thing.  There is writing on it, with directions I presume.  *chirp*  DAMN! It’s loud when it’s 12 inches from my ear.  I don’t have my glasses on so I have no idea what the directions say.  *chirp*  I know I need to get this figured out.  My toes are frozen by now standing on the metal stepstool.  I can barely reach the thing anyway. *chirp* By the grace of God I pushed something and a little door opened and there was the battery compartment. *chirp*

 

I go back down the stepstool, find a 9-volt battery and pray that I remember which way it’s supposed to go.  *chirp*  I put the battery in, close the trap door and count.  *chirp*  Are you freaking kidding me?  So I climb back down the stepstool, go upstairs get my glasses on, go back downstairs.  *chirp* SHUT-UP, stupid smoke detector.  Climb back up on the step stool and find the button that says, “Push to Hush.”  Seriously, was someone trying to be cute with that one? It doesn’t even rhyme for pete’s sake.  *chirp*  I push the dumb button and count.  Wait! I got to 30 and there was no chirp. Hallelujah!  No more chirping.

 

I put the stepstool away, climb back in bed, just start to snuggle in and then I hear, “Mooooommmmmmyyyyyyyy… Mooooommmmmmyyyyyyyy… Mooooommmmmmyyyyyyyy”  Oh well at least nobody can take away my almost six hours of sleep.

 

And yes, if we are healthy enough I will be going to the store to buy more 9-volts and changing all the batteries today.

 

November 13, 2009

What A Day

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Well we’ve reached the mid-point of our deployment.   And today I had my first real breakdown.  I feel bad, the Husband called and I didn’t even say “hello,” instead I began by blurting out; “I can’t take it anymore! I give up!”

Poor guy. As if he wasn’t already worried about my stress level, then I dump that one him.   I really am okay.   But some days are better than others, there is no doubt about it.

Today is one of the not-so-good-really-crappy-rotten-miserable days.  I am not going to sugar coat it.  Today sucks big time.

It started yesterday with the Little One puking.  At least I am finally getting smarter and have realized that for the Little One, puke generally equals ear infection.  So we only dealt with 18 hours or so of puke before getting her in to the doctor.

So in addition to her throwing up and fussing off and on all night, the Big One was having “scary dreams.”  So the small amount of time that I was actually in my bed, I had a four-year-old kicking me, pushing me and grabbing my arm to make sure I was still there.

Finally around 4 a.m.,  I couldn’t take it anymore.  I had started my 9th load of laundry and decided I needed to kick the Big One out of my bed.  I reassured her that things were okay, and that there were no giants that were going to eat her. We made a pact to dream about the playground at La Jolla Shores.  We’d imagine the sand, the salt air, the waves rolling in and all the fun we’d have next time we went to San Diego.

I crawled back into bed and heard the dog get up and head downstairs.  It was odd;  she generally stays up in my room all night.  For a split second I thought I better go downstairs and check on her.  But I was so tired that I decided I would cleanup whatever she was chewing up once the sun came up.

Big mistake.

Oh how I wish I had to clean up a destroyed toy.  Instead I was greeted with doggie diarrhea all over the playroom. Honestly could she not have done it in the kitchen on the tile, or right by the door on a rug?  Nope, right there in the middle of the playroom.

Of course, the Husband called, just as I discovered the diarrhea.

So I was on the edge. Of course he assured me that things would get better.  Yeah right if that’s the case why did the Little One puke all over me at the doctor’s office an hour later?

So now I have more laundry to do and I need to finish scrubbing the carpet.  The good news is that the Little One has actually kept her medicine down for an hour now.  I am dreading the next phase of her recovery.  It’s time to introduce some food and see what happens. Wish me luck.

 

November 10, 2009

Learned Something New

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The last couple days have been rough. The Big One is having some issues. I don’t want to say she is sick necessarily. I really think it’s more allergies than anything else. She’s complaining that her forehead hurts and her eyes hurt. Sounds more like a sinus issue than a cold or flu.

The problem is she also threw up and had a low-grade fever.

So as a result, she and I have not been sleeping well. I am tired, there is no doubt about it.keurig

Today it may have come to a head. I have a Keurig single cup coffee brewer. I love it. It’s fabulous. It’s awesome. I know that I grabbed a K-cup (the thing that holds the coffee) and put it in the appropriate place. I then selected which size cup I wanted to brew. I pushed the button and walked away to feed the dog.

After feeding the dog, I went to the refrigerator, retrieved the Gingerbread Spice creamer and returned to the coffee pot. There was no cup. So I looked across the kitchen, thinking maybe I grabbed it and put it on the counter. No cup.

So I went back across the kitchen, replaying the last two minutes in my brain. I knew I pushed the button. I ever heard the coffee pot brewing. Yet there was no coffee. I was ready to pinch myself to make sure I was truly awake when it dawned on me.

The receptacle that the cup rests on while the coffee is delivered is a few inches thick. I gently popped the top off and there was my coffee all pooled together in the bottom receptacle.

Yes, I am losing my mind. But the amazing thing is there was not a drop of coffee on the counter. I may try it again, just to watch it!

 

October 29, 2009

It Sneaks Up On Me ~ Part II

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It happens at the strangest times.   Well, I guess strange isn’t the right word.   I guess maybe random is a better word.   The Husband has been gone for two months now.

 

So today “it” caught me off card. It, of course refers to how much I miss him.  Like many people I have different ringers on my cell phone for different people. When my sister calls, it plays, “We are Family.” When my niece or my mom friends call, it plays “The Wonder Pets” theme song. And when the Husband calls it plays, “Good Morning Beautiful” which was our first dance song at our wedding reception.

 

Yes, it’s sappy. But it makes me smile every time I hear it. It’s been a good two months now since I’ve heard it.  It’s really strange to go from hearing it at least once a day to never hearing it.

 

Now I know he is gone and I know that my father-in-law is using the Husband’s cell phone while he is gone. {We are trying to convince FIL that it’s good to have a cell phone, so before taking the plunge himself, he is “testing” out the Husband’s).

 

As I was hanging out with the Little One while the Big One is a preschool, my phone started playing, “Good Morning Beautiful.”

 

I can’t explain it very well other than to say, my heart skipped a beat and my face began to smile. It was a nice, but bittersweet moment.

 

It took just a split second for my smile to fade and change to worry though, because I knew that it meant FIL was calling and I also know that the Husband’s Grandpa is having surgery today.  Fortunately he just had a silly question for me. And Grandpa is just now being prepped for surgery.

 

 

 

October 25, 2009

Some Lessons Learned

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So many people have lived through deployments and have shared their tips on various forums and blogs. I thought I would share a few of my lessons learned with you all.

  • If you send brand new desert tan colored combat boots, do not use newspaper to pad the box. The newsprint bleeds onto the lovely tan boots.
  • Writing your spouses name and address directly on a box will make your spouse very cranky. They have a 100% shred policy so anything with names or address has to be shred. It is apparently very difficult to shred a box by hand. So write name and address on a piece of paper and tape that piece of paper on the box. (do not write or draw anything on the boxes that you send!)
  • Contrary to what I read on-line, a Pringles can is not a good means of sending cookies. I suppose if I had used A LOT more saran wrap around them to pad them it might have worked.
  • A coffee can, on the other hand provides a great means for protecting cookies. If you wrap two or three together in plastic wrap and then strategically pack your little bundles in the coffee can they will travel very well.
  • If you are gong to send brownies, do not cut them. Send a giant brownie so that when they arrive they can be cut and will not be all dried out.
 

October 22, 2009

Murphy’s Law #4

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HIS Car

Murphy’s law is an adage that broadly states: “Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.”

Are you freaking kidding me? Is about the only thing I can say about this one.   I have been so good about starting the Husband’s car at least once a week. He harasses me about starting it and honest to goodness, I really have been good about it.

It’s parked up on the top side part of our driveway.  Our next door neighbor’s are putting in some cement right next to where the car is parked.  So I’ve told them when they needed it moved to let me know and I would gladly move it so they can get the wheelbarrow up where they need it to be.

So today was the day.  I started the damn car last Friday.  It’s been 6 days.  My parents were here, they can vouch for the fact that I started the car and that it did in fact start.

So just a bit ago, I went out to start it.  I was chatting with the neighbors.  They were giving me a hard time about when I was going to wash it.  The Husband is religious about washing the cars.  He does it at least every other week.  I don’t wash cars.  So they haven’t been washed in the seven weeks he’s been gone.  His car is filthy.  You can barely tell it’s black, it looks more tan with the dirt coating on it.

Anyway, I put the key in and tried to start it.  Nothing.   I tried again.  Nothing.  It was not turning over for anything. Seriously, it’s been SIX days since I started it.

So the neighbor moved his car over, jumped the Husband’s car and I moved it to the other side of the driveway.   Not sure what I am going to do now.  I don’t want to leave it where it is.  Our driveway is on one nasty slope and I don’t want it sitting there for the next three months.  But going and getting a new battery doesn’t like much fun right now either.  UGH!

 

October 11, 2009

It’s All in The Timing

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The Little One has been sick for about three days now.  It started on Thursday night with eight hours of puking. No joke, no exaggeration.  She threw up every 20 minutes from 9 p.m. until 5 a.m.  It was pleasant.

Then on Friday she started complaining her ears hurt.  She had a low grade fever, but seemed all right after a few hours sleep. She was a bit grumpy on Saturday morning, then was fine.  But by Saturday night she was a grouch again.  Again she started telling me her ear hurt.

So I decided that today, Sunday, would be the day we made the trip to Urgent Care.  If she had an ear infection, it had already been a few days and I wanted to get her started on meds sooner versus later.

We had made arrangements to try out Skype with the Husband this morning.  So I knew I needed to wait for his call and then we’d head to Urgent Care.

Now one other aside about the Little One’s sickness; She had not pooped since Thursday.  Considering her decreased appetite with the large volume of puke, I was a little concerned, but not overly concerned.  I figured I would bring it up at the Urgent Care visit along with the other symptoms.

So what do y’all think happened the second the Husband called? I had just answered his call, spotted him on the computer, showed the Big One where to look for Daddy when it happened.  Not only did the Little One poop at that exact moment, she had the most disgusting liquid explosion in her entire life.  We are talking spilling out of the diaper, soaking through her sweat pants.  And the smell?  Oh my Lord, the smell was horrendous.

I’ve been a mom for 4.5 years.  I have dealt with my share of stinky poop, but y’all I was gagging on the floor, while trying to clean up the mess.  As I tried desperately not to get it on the carpet, the Big One continued to talk to Daddy as the video cut in and out.   Each time he disappeared, she was yelling, “DADDY? Are you there? DADDY???”

I’m not sure if it was a case of too many people clogging the server on his end, or if it was something that I had done wrong. I just know that he was cutting in and out as I was trying desperately to clean up the poop explosion.  Both kids were freaking out for different reasons.  The dog was trying to figure out where the smell was coming from by nudging the diaper with her nose.  I was holding the Little One’s legs and butt up in the air, while trying to clean up the mess and at the same time shooing Gracie Lou away from the diaper.

Meanwhile, the Husband is just sort of staring in disbelief at the computer trying to figure out what all the chaos was about.  I contemplated telling him we’d try back in 5 minutes, but then I figured what’s the use, there would surely be something else going on, so we pressed on.

We did get to talk and see each other off and on for about 10 minutes.  It was pretty cool, that’s for sure.

Of course, now the Little One keeps looking at the computer and saying, “I want to talk to Daddy!!”

 

October 5, 2009

It Sneaks Up On Me

Posted by fixitmommy under Time, Uncategorized | Tags: , , |
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It happens at the strangest times.   Well, I guess strange isn’t the right word.   I guess maybe random is a better word.   The Husband has been gone for a month now; One down a few more to go.

Over the last few weeks, the girls and I have gotten into a decent rhythm.  We are learning what to expect from one another and how far we can push each other before we all become very miserable.

I really have gone into a survival-type mode. More days than not I feel like I am doing what I can just to make it to bedtime.   I don’t dwell too much during the day on the fact that the Husband is gone.   If I start thinking about it, then inevitably my mind wanders to how long it will be until he gets home.   And quite frankly, that is too depressing to think about.

So most days, we simply go about our business and do whatever it is we need to do.  Obviously we do think about him and talk about him throughout the day, but we don’t put a whole lot of emphasis on time.

Anyway this routine works for me.  If I don’t stop long enough to get sad, I won’t get sad.

Yesterday in church, I was sitting behind a couple.  They were probably in their late 40’s. (for those of you who read my Facebook updates, they were NOT the ones texting during  the sermon!)

At this particular time in the service, we were standing singing a song.   For whatever reason, I was watching them while I sang.   They both had their hands resting on the pew in front of them.   At one point the husband swayed with the music and his fingers brushed up against hers.   Over the next few seconds, I watched as their fingers all slowly became intertwined. Then as they held hands for the rest of the song, it all hit me.

As my eyes filled up with tears, I realized that there was nobody around to hold my hand.  Now normally I am not a big hand-holder.  After a few minutes, your hands get all sweaty and all the romance of the moment is gone.

I guess it’s the realization that there is nobody there to quietly brush up against.  There is nobody there to give you a hug when the kids are driving you bonkers.  There is nobody there to scratch your back when you have that one elusive itch.  There is just nobody there.

{Yes, I am turning into a big ole sap. Leave me alone, okay!}

 

October 1, 2009

Murphy’s Law #3

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The lawn mower.

Murphy’s law is an adage that broadly states: “Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.”

Honestly I shouldn’t be annoyed that the lawn mower died, right?  I should take advantage and let my neighbor mow for me like he has volunteered to do.

It’s the principle of the damn thing.  About 18 months ago when the Husband was gone for 6 weeks, our other lawn mower died.   I did mounds of research and bought a new one.   We have a large hill in the front yard, so I got a great self-propelled lawn mower.   I used it once and I paid some neighborhood kid to mow with it once.   The kid loved it, I didn’t mind mowing with it.

So the Husband gets home, uses it once and deems it horrible.   It’s too heavy he complained.   I tried explaining to him that it was heavy because it was self-propelled.   He didn’t like it, so he returned it.

I said fine you go buy one.   So instead of him buying one, he called his dad who told him what kind he would get.   Of course our local stores didn’t carry it.   So my father-in-law bought it for us.   I think we drove it home from San Diego one weekend last fall.

The Husband used it a couple times before winter came along.   Being dumb we didn’t run it out of gas.   So this past spring, the thing wouldn’t start.   The lawn mower repair people fought with the manufacturer on it and finally gave up saying it needed a new carburetor because we left “bad gas” in it.   So we paid $90 to get the dumb thing fixed.

It’s  been maybe six months.   The thing has been used to cut the grass every couple weeks just fine since we replaced the carburetor.   Until today.   Seriously?   Is it because the Husband is gone?   Or another case of “bad gas?”   I think it’s a case of a crappy lawn mower.   Not necessarily the brand but a bad apple if you will.

Of course it could always just be Murphy’s Law.

And just for the record, I didn’t take advantage of my neighbor, I just borrowed their mower and did it myself.   And now I have to figure out what to do with the piece of crap in my garage.

 

September 28, 2009

Becoming a Better Parent

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I know I seem to be complaining or whining a lot and I don’t want this to be a downer.  So today I will tell you one good thing about this deployment.  And trust me, it’s a great thing that I hope will come out of this adventure.

I have a quick temper.  I am a yeller.  When I am frustrated, mad or annoyed I tend to yell.  Just ask the girls or the dog. I can yell.

I developed a terrible habit of yelling and/or threatening a spanking to get the girls to comply with whatever I wanted them to do.  I know it’s terrible, so please don’t berate me for it.  I am working on it.

I could pretend to control it by letting my frustration grow and grow and grow during the day, knowing that the Husband would be home and provide some relief.  But now I can’t do that.  The first week or so that the Husband was gone, was tough.  I yelled a lot.  The girls were scared into doing what I wanted them to do.  I was not coping well and they were suffering.  The last thing I want is for my kids to be afraid of me.

Through lots of prayer and reflection, I figured out the problem was my temper and I knew that I needed to get it in check or we will not survive this time.

Another problem I discovered was the Big One was turning into a little tyrant.  She was mimicking exactly what I was doing, except her anger was usually directed at her sister or a toy.  She would get mad, yell and she added the great gift of throwing whatever the offending object was.  {for the record I am not a thrower, just a yeller!}

So for the last three weeks, we have been working on using nice voices and being calm when what we really want to do is yell. I’ve tried the whispering tactic.  When I get frustrated with the girls, I speak in a very quiet voice so that they have to stop whatever they are dong to hear what I am saying.   It works sometimes.

I have been working hard to find other means of discipline besides spanking.  {Just a note, this has NOTHING to do with the recent study that come out saying that kids who are spanked have a lower IQ.  I think that’s a bunch of hooey. They are way too many other factors that determine IQ and way too many factors in individual homes to make that connection.}  I do think that in some instances, a swat on the bottom can go a long way.

But I was guilty of automatically resorting to a spanking (more the threat than the actual act) in order to get the girls to do what I wanted.   And I know that is not an effective means of discipline.  So we are working together to find other ways to teach them what behaviors are okay and which are not.

Another tactic I am using is to say, “That’s not okay,” Instead of constantly screaming, “NO!” or “STOP!” I read that on another blog that I love to read.  If I could find the actual post where I read it, I’d put a link here, but alas I cannot find it.

So anyway, we are working on things.  We are working on better communication.  We are working on lowering our voices.  And we are working on discipline without spanking.  If all goes well, we will be a much happier household and I will be a much better parent.

 

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